Neither Could Dylan

Let’s keep it light today and just have a little chat, yea? 

Casual Conversation is the only track that on this album that I started the production with a riff instead of a lyric. 

Well, sort of.

I had written the riff that you hear repeating throughout a ways back and been sitting on it for a long time, knowing I wanted to use it but wasn’t sure the best way how. At the same time, I wrote most of the lyrics for this one but was having trouble finishing the thought. I ended up trying to pair the first verse to my riff after months of doing nothing with either of these and found they worked pretty well. 

Then I hacked together a chorus progression (not the one you hear on this record) that took this into a Blink-182 “Stay Together For The Kids” vibe. I’ve always loved how that chorus explodes, it’s probably one of my favourite moments in any Blink song, but it felt way too close for my own liking and led this song into a really dark place lyrically that I wasn’t sure I wanted it to go. 

So I scraped it entirely and after finding the right tone for the riff, I was able to find a more appropriate chorus chord progression that kept it in this more indie-rock sound that I’d never really tried to write in before. 

Check out the Casual Conversation Acoustic-Bedroom Live on YouTube

It isn’t explicitly stated but in the verses of this song I’m talking about the casual way sometimes we fall into relationships and tell the person we’re with we love them too quickly, before we’ve really given ourselves the opportunity to get to know each other. I think a lot of us are really keen to find someone we can spend our time with and message on a whim through the day and this has the potential to lead us to make quick and dramatic decisions. After all, we all just want to love and be loved.

In the second verse I recognize that I’ve done this and I have to sit with the troubling feeling that things are moving too fast and I’m not sure how to approach the subject because frankly, we’re just not that close yet. A weird problem that should be easier to solve than it is, but we get into our own heads about this type of thing, don’t we? 

On the one hand you don’t want to hurt the other person and reject them, and on the other you’ve gone so far as to tell them you love them and maybe cold feet is a real thing, so maybe you just need to stick it out a little longer? 

That last point is one I think about now and again, especially when it comes to weddings. Growing up it was always really common to hear people talk about pre-wedding jitters and how it’s normal for people to get nervous before their own and not want to go through with it, but the general consensus here has been to go through with it anyways. I think that’s been a terrible way to approach this experience. Now, I would tell anyone that has any sort of pre-wedding jitters to take their time with it, really embrace those thoughts and feelings and where you think they might be coming from and if you want to, absolutely call off that wedding. 

If the person you’re set to marry is the person you should ultimately be with, then I’m a firm believer they would be understanding of your decision to want to wait and they’d be willing to wait with you, and I am absolutely a firm believer in trusting yourself above any old wives tale about the jitters. I suspect that must have come from a place where marriages were even more transactional than they are now or even arranged as they do in many cultures, but if you have the freedom of choice then it is absolutely your right to use it. 

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Here are the official lyrics for Casual Conversation:

You know I don’t wanna say it
That night when we both declared it
I don’t think we understood the underlying implications
of such a casual conversation

I know now I should have told you then
When I first started to fit the pieces in
But you and I we aren’t the type to talk like this
Haven’t you ever wondered why that is?

Stay up late
Stand up straight
For beneath this weight
Uncover faith in fate

We should have seen this coming
There were warning signs all over it
We weren’t going to make the same mistakes they did
They always said we weren’t those kinds of kids

I know now I should have told you then
When I first started to fit the pieces in

Stay up late (What’s at stake)
Stand up straight (Lies in this wake)
For beneath this weight (All that remains)
Uncover faith in fate (Ruins to guide the shape)

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Lyrically the chorus enters a more philosophical headspace for me and mirrors the way I’d now go about dealing with any challenging situation. Take your time, (stay up late if you have to), be confident in yourself (stand up straight), and know that however difficult this feels now, you will come out of the situation stronger than before (have a little faith). Even if it ultimately works to break you down first, those pieces of yourself that feel broken are what you will use to build a stronger foundation for the future (ruins to guide the shape).

We don’t always get it right the first time – it’s okay to pick yourself up and try again. 

Listen to Casual Conversation wherever you stream & don’t forget you can order the album on CD through our online store. 

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Next time on the blog, I’ll share my thoughts on track 7: Loose Change. 

In case you missed it, jump back to the overview blog about this record or follow the below index to read the previous blogs in this series:

Track 1: Tapes
Track 2: Chemical Therapy
Track 3: To Be Loved
Track 4: Skeleton
Track 5: Dismal
Track 6: Casual Conversation (you are here!)
Track 7: Loose Change
Track 8: Happy
Track 9: Without You
Track 10: Wishing Well